What lies beyond the hill.

On paper,  she has the perfect life. She lives in a nice city, has a good job, is surrounded by family and friends. Her love life is one that is envied. Yet, with all these things going for her, deep down she feels like there is something missing. There is a world out there that is calling her name, waiting for her to explore it. She feels like she is standing at the bottom of a hill, looking at the peak, wondering what lies on the other side. So one day, she makes a big decision. To leave all that is comfortable and familiar, and find out what lies beyond what the eye can see. Its not an easy decision, but somehow deep down, she knows its the right one.

After a lot of internal anguish, she starts the process of letting go of what she has known her whole life. She turns in her resignation at work, gives her partner the ‘its not you its me’ speech as Fergie’s lyrics to “big girls don’t cry’ echo through her head. Her family is hesitant to let her go, but they are supportive. She does not have a specific plan. All she knows is she needs to leave and head somewhere. Maybe from this new place, she  can think more clearly, see the future with a different set of eyes. Maybe even find a greener patch of grass. From this new place, she can feel alive again; and who knows, maybe after she has seen what is on the other side of the hill, she will return home and fit right back in like a missing part of a puzzle.

Sitting at the airport, she stares down at what years of her life  have been reduced down to. Two large suitcases and a carry on bag. She looks at the ticket placed between the pages of the lonely plant that her brother gave her as a partying gift.  She knows where she will be spending the next couple of nights, but beyond that, the rest is uncertain. She smiles at the thought that she is both nervous and excited. Her flight starts boarding. She looks back and gives her family one last wave. She can tell her mother is besides herself, but she is hiding her pain. During their chat the night before, she showed her how to use Whattsapp and Facetime. She even opened an Instagram account for her so she can follow her daughter’s adventures. She gets the urge to run back past security to give her family one last hug. She can see them blowing kisses and her father mouths the words ‘we love you’.

She is next to board. She fights the tears stinging behind her eyes and puts on a brave face. The attendant hands her back her paper work and wishes her a good flight. She takes a deep breathe and steps forward, knowing there is no turning back. She knows that tomorrow she might feel scared, doubtful and lonely. She knows that she will have days when this may seem like a bad decision, but like her family said to her, she can always come back home. So, on this sunny day, clear and blue skies, her heart threatening to pound through her chest wall,  she takes one last breathe and lets it all go, and soars to great heights.